| Acronym | Meaning |
 | RBS | Really Bad Shape |
| UNIVAC | Unusually Nasty Infection, Vultures Are Circling |
| CF | Cockroach Factor - A Patient's Ability To Survive Trauma Or Serious Treatment Is Inversely Proportional To His Contribution To Society. |
| PGT | Pissed (Drunk) And Got Thumped |
| DIDC | Dose Of I Don't Care - Pain-killing Meds That Make Patient Light-headed |
| PDSD | Pre-Detention Stress Disorder - A Person Who Feigns Medical Symptoms When Police Handcuff Him |
| SBA | Silver Bracelet Award - Patient Is A Prisoner Brought In Wearing Cuffs |
| TATT | Talks All The Time (also "Tired All The Time") |
| CROACC | Cannot Rule Out Anything, Correlate Clinically |
| TTTR | Tooth To Tattoo Ratio - Visual Determination Of Basic Intelligence. A Positive Ratio (more Teeth Then Tattoos) Is Generally Better Than A Negative Ratio, Which Is Bad. |
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