| Acronym | Meaning |
 | HOPEFUL | Hard-up Old Person Expecting Full Useful Life (i.e. OAPs Are Not Priority For Most Hospitals) |
| PLH | Pray Long And Hard |
| KFO | Knock The F*cker Out (patient Either Obnoxious Or Screaming In Pain) |
| PP | Pumpkin Positive - A Penlight Shone Into The Patient's Mouth/ear Would Encounter A Brain So Small That The Whole Head Would Light Up |
| FOL | Fat Old Lady, Gone Off Legs (GOF), Full Of Sh*t(FOS). Confused Elderly Female, Unable To Exercise At Home, Now Unable To Move Unaided And Badly Constipated As A Result (see Also TCS). |
| CFD | Call For Dirt (severely Ill Or Dying) |
| RHS | Rocking Horse Stool - Even Rarer Than Hen's Teeth |
| SVRI | Something Very Wrong Inside (usually Terminal) |
| OFIGATOOS | One Foot In The Grave And The Other One Slipping |
| YAVIS | Young, Attractive, Verbal, Intelligent, Successful. |
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