| Acronym | Meaning |
 | AE | Aggressive Euthanasia - A Procedure That Obnoxious Patients Would Benefit From. |
| P4P | Penicillin For Prick (peniecille For Penile Discharge) |
| AWTB | Away With The Birds; A Patient Who Is Totally Confused |
| LOFD | Looks Okay From Door |
| PP | Pumpkin Positive - A Penlight Shone Into The Patient's Mouth/ear Would Encounter A Brain So Small That The Whole Head Would Light Up |
| HSPL | High Serum Porcelain Level - Patient Is A Crock Of Sh*t |
| MTF | Metabolize To Freedom (i.e. Let The Person Sober Up, And Then They Can Leave) |
| WWI | Walking While Intoxicated (and Fell Over) |
| TYFTIC | Thank You For This Interesting Consult - This Is Complete B*llsh*t |
| SOCMOB | Standing On Corner Minding Own Business (when Inexplicably Injured) |
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