| Acronym | Meaning |
 | FITH | F*cked In The Head |
| MFC | Measure For Coffin |
| BWCO | Baby Won't Come Out (needs Caesarian) |
| TTR | (US) Tattoo-to-Tooth Ratio (Dirtbag Ratio) |
| OTDPDS | Out The Door Pretty Damn Soon |
| OPD | Obnoxious Personality Disorder |
| CPM | Calcified Penisitis Morbidium - Male Patient Whose Ailment Is Due To Excessive Or Unprotected Sex |
| PSS | Positive Suitcase Sign - Patients Who Are Repeated Admissions For Prolonged Periods With No Physiological Cause Of Their Problems. They Turn Up At Hospital With Packed Suitcases Ready For Admission |
| PRATFO | Patient Reassured And Told To F*** Off |
| AGMI | Ain't Gonna Make It (won't Survive) |
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