| Acronym | Meaning |
 | TBC | Total Body Crunch: Multiple Injuries |
| MICOS | Masterly Inactivity, Cat-like Observation And Steroids |
| LOLFDGB | Little Old Lady, Fall Down, Go Boom |
| BFH | Brat From Hell (usually Accompanied By PFH - Parent(s) From Hell) |
| LGFD | Looks Good From Door (but Not Closely Examined) |
| TOG | Tears Of Gratitude |
| GOLP | Generalised Old Lady Pains |
| BOHICA | Bend Over, Here It Comes Again |
| WAFTAM | ("woff-tam"): Waste Of F***ing Time And Money |
| HOPEFUL | Hard-up Old Person Expecting Full Useful Life (i.e. OAPs Are Not Priority For Most Hospitals) |
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