| Acronym | Meaning |
| SVRI | Something Very Wrong Inside (usually Terminal) |
| EDDU | Eating Drinking Defecating Urinating (but Not Much Else) |
| UBI | Unexplained Beer Injury |
| ELFS | Evil Little F*ckers (irritating Children) |
| CFU | Complete(ly) F*ck(ed) Up |
| SWW | Sick, Wet And Whiny (infant) |
| RHS | Rocking Horse Stool - Even Rarer Than Hen's Teeth |
| RBS | Really Bad Shape |
| BMW | Bitch Moan & Whine |
| GTMJACB | Gone To Meet Jesus, Ain't Coming Back (dead) |