| Acronym | Meaning |
 | HAIRY PSALMS | Haven't Any Idea Regarding Your Patient, Send A Lot More Serum |
| CRT | Can't Really Treat |
| FURB | Funny, Unusual, Rectal Blockage (people Who Use Inappropriate Objects To Insert Into The Rectum) |
| NSA | Non-Standard Appearance (what A FLK Grows Into) |
| DBI | Dirt Bag Index: Number Of Tattoos X Number Of Missing Teeth = Days Since The Patient Last Bathed |
| LOLINAD | Little Old Lady In No Acute Distress |
| TMB | Too Many Birthdays: Person Dying Of "old Age" |
| SFSF | Sphincter Factor Scale: 1 To 10 Scale Indicating Degree Of Bowel-loosening In Response To An Emergency |
| FOS | Full Of Sh*t (either Severely Constipated Or Metaphorically) |
| FUBIL | F*ck You Buddy, I'm Leaving. The Act Of A Doctor At A Small Hospital Dumping A Critically Ill Patient On Larger Hospital On Friday Afternoon Before He Leaves For The Weekend. |
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