| Acronym | Meaning |
 | IWB | Intercourse With Biscuits (F**king Crackers) |
| ERNOBW | Engine Running, No One Behind The Wheel (questionable IQ) |
| FORD | Found On Road Dead |
| PSS | Positive Suitcase Sign - Patients Who Are Repeated Admissions For Prolonged Periods With No Physiological Cause Of Their Problems. They Turn Up At Hospital With Packed Suitcases Ready For Admission |
| RBS | Really Bad Shape |
| CTS | Cold-tea Sign / Cold Tea Syndrome - Refers To The Several Cups Of Cold Tea On The Bedside Cabinet Beside A Dead Geriatric (i.e. No-one Noticed The Patient Had Died) |
| ECU | Eternal Care Unit: Heaven ("gone To The ECU" = Dead) |
| GLF | Ground Level Fall (tripped Over) |
| DMFNFL | Dumb Mother F*cker, Not Fit To Live |
| VOMIT | Victim Of Modern Imaging Technology (i.e. Try Treating The Patient, Not The Report From Radiology; Particularly Referring To Invasive Procedures For False Positives. |
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