| Acronym | Meaning |
| DPS | Dumb Parent Syndrome |
| AST | Assuming Seasonal Temperature (dead) |
| PWFS | Post-Weekend Fatigue Syndrome - An Ailment Which Presents At GP Surgeries On Monday Mornings |
| FLKBCOTP | Funny Looking Kid But Check Out The Parents |
| DIDC | Dose Of I Don't Care - Pain-killing Meds That Make Patient Light-headed |
| SOB | Short Of Breath |
| OBE | Open Both Ends (known In UK As DNV - Diarrhoea And Vomiting) |
| ECU | Eternal Care Unit: Heaven ("gone To The ECU" = Dead) |
| FORD | Found On Road Dead |
| LOL | Little Old Lady |