| Acronym | Meaning |
| BMW | Bitch Moan & Whine |
| CRAFT | Can't Remember A Fucking Thing |
| CF | Cockroach Factor - A Patient's Ability To Survive Trauma Or Serious Treatment Is Inversely Proportional To His Contribution To Society. |
| CRS | Can't Remember Shit |
| IP | Insurance Pain - Neck Pain Secondary To A Minor Car Bump |
| VBT | Very Bad Thing |
| MCBP | Member Of The College Of Bystander Physicians I.e. Doctor Having A Look-see |
| CLOMI | Cat Like Observation And Masterful Inactivity (patient Under Observation) |
| GRAFOB | Grim Reaper At Foot Of Bed |
| HSPL | High Serum Porcelain Level - Patient Is A Crock Of Sh*t |